Healthy Relationship Checklist

What is a healthy relationship? A healthy relationship is one where two independent people make a deal to help the other be the best version of themselves.  I’ve included a list of healthy attributes in a relationship for you to think about.

Healthy Relationship Checklist
 Open and spontaneous communication (speaking and listening)
 Clear explicit boundaries and expectations are expressed with flexibility
 Trust of each other
 Feeling of security and self-confidence exists for both
 Personal identity, freedom and individual sense of self is encouraged
 Negotiations are fair without power plays, whining, or threats
 Both enjoy doing things for self and each other
 Having fun together is common – healthy humor and play included
 Neither tries to “fix”, change, or control the other
 Feelings and needs are expressed
 Each is accepted for their real self
 Both have humility and can let go of “being right”
 Respect for each other and the relationship
 Conflict is dealt with openly, resolution or management is reached
 Both are open to feedback
 Balance of giving and receiving happens
 There is an ability to forgive self and other
 Mistakes are accepted as part of being human and they are learned from
 Both are willing to take risks and be vulnerable with each other
 Meaningful relationships and interests exist without taking away from the couple
 Each can enjoy time alone
 Privacy is respected
 Change, personal growth, and exploration are all encouraged
 Commitment is continuous and consistent
 There is a balance of together and separation
 Each takes responsibility for their own behaviors (no blame or shame)
 You have time to be together as a couple (not just parents, providers, etc.)
 A sense of working together as partners exists
 Tenderness and physical affection connect you



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